August 31, 2010

Three-Sentence Reviews: Cartridge-Era Nintendo Games

Why not bang another one of these out? I give you all the games I beat prior to August '09 on the Nintendo Entertainment System, Super Nintendo Entertainment System, and Nintendo 64. Some of these were technically beaten as ports on GameCube, Game Boy Color, and the Wii's "Virtual Console," but I felt it best to include them all here with their temporal and generational peers. I hope you're in the mood for another thirty retro-posts.

ActRaiser (SNES, 1991)
I traded Final Fantasy VI, perhaps my favorite game of all time, for this little-known God-simulation. I regretted the move almost immediately, but then less so over time as I grew to love ActRaiser and its unique clash of Castlevania and Civilization gameplay. Besides, you can find FF6 on just about any system nowadays anyway.

The Adventures of Mighty Max (SNES, 1994)
How obscure and irrelevant was this fad-based game? The Internet can't even agree on its release year or box art. All I remember about this one was collecting pieces for some sort of giant machine, so don't bother.

Chrono Trigger (SNES, 1995)
Square has made a number of RPGs without the Final Fantasy moniker, but this is probably the best and most famous one. I never actually owned it on the SNES but played and beat a couple of friends' copies. I recently bought the DS port and played and beat it one more time.

Donkey Kong Country (SNES, 1994)
People underestimate how much this game (and Rare in general) contributed to the success of the Super Nintendo. I'm still amazed by the pre-rendered 3D graphics and how ahead of their time they were. I mean, this game looks better than anything on the N64.

Donkey Kong Country 2: Diddy's Kong Quest (SNES, 1995)
This is my favorite game in the original DKC trilogy. Donkey Kong is absent, but the game was pirate-themed from top to bottom. And this was long before pirates were a tiresome theme thanks to overexposure and some blockbuster Disney films.

Donkey Kong Country 3: Dixie Kong's Double Trouble! (SNES, 1996)
The series began to lose some steam here. It has no DK, no Diddy, and less overall charm than either of its predecessors. But it's still an enjoyable game and perhaps the most complete and open-ended DKC to date.

Final Fantasy IV (SNES, 1991)
I was in kindergarten when an older neighbor first introduced me to this game and the entire RPG genre in the process, and I was instantly hooked. I've played better RPGs over the years, for sure, but this one will always hold a special place in my catalog. Besides, it still holds up as a very solid game with memorable characters and an interesting story.

Final Fantasy VI (SNES, 1994)
This may be my favorite video game ever thanks to its incredible story. The characters, environment, conflict, and music are all absolutely top notch. You'd be hard pressed to find a better RPG than this one, and many seasoned veterans of the Final Fantasy series agree that you simply can't do so.

Home Alone (SNES, 1991)
This came bundled with my SNES way back when, and I never would have purchased it otherwise. You run round with a squirt gun fighting hoards of burglars, rats, and spiders. Not only is it shitty, but it doesn't even resemble the movie upon which it is allegedly based.

Killer Instinct (SNES, 1995)
This was my favorite fighting game before the Super Smash Bros. series was born. It combines the brutality of the Mortal Kombat games with a sense of humor and unique characters. Plus, to add to its overall badassery in third-grade-me's eyes, the cartridge was black instead of gray.

The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past (SNES, 1991)
A lot of old school fans consider this the best Zelda game ever, but I totally disagree. It felt a tad repetitious and unoriginal at times. Great for it's time, sure, but Link to the Past was no Ocarina or Twlight Princess.

The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time (N64, 1998)
There are plenty of people in my age group who consider this the greatest game ever, and though i don't necessarily agree, I'll admit that it warrants a place among the discussion. I didn't own an N64 until five or six years ago, so I missed the boat the first time around. Fortunately, I got to play a GameCube port in 2002 and it flat-out delivered, hype and everything.

The Lion King (SNES, 1994)
I did not love this game. In 2000 or so, I traded for it using something I can't even recall, with hopes that it'd be as good as the SNES Aladdin game. It wasn't.

Mario Kart 64 (N64, 1997)
Call me a crotchety old man, but I think Super Mario Kart is still a better game. Of course, I can't deny that this was a step forward for the fledgling series that vaulted it straight to the top of the racing game genre, a position it has yet to lose. I suppose I'd like this a lot more had I had an N64 when it was still in vogue.

Mario Paint (SNES, 1992)
This is a very non-traditional offering from Nintendo in that it is more of an art studio than it is an actual game. It gave my friends and I several years of entertainment here and there. I still don't know why Nintendo hasn't revisited this concept on the Wii or the DS.

Mega Man X (SNES, 1994)
On the one hand, this is an awesome, awesome game. On the other hand, it's buried among two or three dozen Mega Man games and will therefore never get the respect it deserves. I've played almost twenty Mega Man games in the past year alone, as Back-Blogged readers may recall with a wince or a grimace, and I can assure you that this was the greatest one.

NBA Showdown 94 (SNES, 1993)
I don't know if this is definitely the worst game I've ever played, but it's on the short list. It's laggy, blocky, slow, and ancient-feeling. There isn't even a regular season option or a save feature.

Pokémon Snap (N64, 1999)
I had a lot of fun with this game back in its heyday when I was a huge Pokémon nerd and I had a lot of fun with it about three or four years ago in a much more sarcastic fashion. I guess my point is that this game is fun whether you enjoy or mock the Pokémon franchise. If they made a sequel for the Wii, I'd probably buy it, regardless of the fact that I know nothing about the newest 700 Pokémon species.

Rocko's Modern Life: Spunky's Dangerous Day (SNES, 1994)
My grandparents bought me this game before I even knew what Rocko's Modern Life was. I still enjoyed it, a little bit, although it was very frustrating at times. Actually, this is easily one of the five most frustrating games I've ever played, so even on the off chance that you felt like finding and playing this game, I'd advise against it.

Secret of Evermore (SNES, 1995)
This is kind of an RPG-adventure hybrid in that it contains adventure elements like moving around while fighting enemies and charging up attacks, but it also lets you select commands from menus mid-battle in a definitively RPG style. Actually, that sounds a lot like the last two Final Fantasy games. But I had a lot more fun with this game than I did with FF12, and I very much recommend this somewhat unique game.

Star Fox 64 (N64, 1997)
This is the greatest game in the Star Fox franchise, but that sadly doesn't say as much as it should. I hate to keep pointing to my lack of an N64 for the first ten years of its existence, but once again it seems like I don't respect this game as much as I would have if I'd played it before I was 18 years old. Eh, whatever.

Super Mario 64 (N64, 1996)
Alright, now here's a 64 game that even I can love. Even if it wasn't already iconic for ushering platforming games into the third dimension, it would still be a fantastic game complete from top to bottom. This is just an absolute classic and there's little else to say.

Super Mario Bros. (NES, 1986)
This certainly isn't the best game of all time, but it might just be the most iconic one. There's little to say about it since its reputation precedes it. Actually, this game is older than me, and as such, I hardly even feel fit to judge it.

Super Mario Bros. 2 (NES, 1988)
Ah yes, the bastard child in the Super Mario crop. In case you weren't aware, this was never even supposed to be a Mario game, but Super Mario Bros. 2 (now known here as The Lost Levels) was deemed too difficult for American gamers back in '88 so they updated this odd duck with Mario sprites and released it in place of the actual SMB 2. In Japan, they call this game Super Mario USA, and frankly, as an American, that embarrasses me a little bit.

Super Mario Bros. 3 (NES, 1990)
The original Nintendo console was way before my time, so I'm not too fit to judge it or its games with respect to their era. But I still consider this the magnum opus of the NES, and I think the consensus opinion agrees. It's a shame that the franchise never brought back raccoon tails and frog suits.

Super Mario Bros.: The Lost Levels (NES, 1993)
The release date I've provided corresponds to the game's first release in America. In Japan, where it was known as Super Mario Bros. 2, it came out in 1986. I found it just as easy as the first SMB, and I really don't see what the big deal was.

Super Mario Kart (SNES, 1992)
I first played a demo of this game at a Sears when I was four years old. (Yes, believe it or not, before we had GameStops in every town and Best Buys in every shopping complex, Sears was a place that had video games set up for demonstration.) Anyway, I loved it then, I love it now, and I don't think another racing game will ever come close to doing what this one did for the genre at large.

Super Mario World (SNES, 1991)
If there's a game that best represents my childhood, it's this one. I made everyone I knew, from my friends to my grandparents to my cousins to my younger sisters, play it with me. And I loved every minute of it.

Super Mario World 2: Yoshi's Island (SNES, 1995)
This is a great game in its own right, but unfortunately it carries with it the burden of its predecessor's title. As good as this Yoshi-centric game is, I can't help but feel disappointed when I imagine what a real Super Mario World 2 could have been. Sigh.

Super R-Type (SNES, 1991)
This is a scrolling shooter set in space. All things considered, it's extremely generic and non-memorable. A multiplayer option would have made it better.

And that's that. Hit me up with your thoughts on one or any number of these old school classics. You can even use more than three sentences to reminisce if you'd like! Fifty-four video game retro-posts down, 103 to go. And like a hundred books. And like 400 DVDs. Good God, what have I gotten myself into?

1 comment:

  1. Some comments on the ones I've played-

    Chrono Trigger- Excellent! Totally lived up to the hype, probably my favorite of the few rpgs I've played so far.

    The Donkey Kong Country series- all of the kids at the lake would meet up on rainy days in some random woman's house to play her SNES, and the DKC series was the go-to most of the time. I had a blast with it and loved the visuals as well, but I never got to finish it. I'm debating hitting up the series on VC before I play DKC Returns.

    FF4- Better than 1, certainly, and about on par with 9 (aside from the final temple. I swear, I actually liked the game!)

    Killer Instinct- I bet I'd hate the game if I played it now, the combat seems pretty shallow. But you nailed the reason I and everyone else I knew loved it- the unique characters! While Mortal Kombat and Street Fighter had a dozen random dudes and girls who you could barely tell apart, Killer Instinct had, from my memory, a jacked tomahawk-wielding Indian, a skeleton/pirate, a man made of ice (and one made of fire), a dinosaur, a robot, a werewolf, a boxer, a ninja, the token sexy chick, and some sort of centaur/cyclops thing. Variety!

    Link to the Past- Agreed, this gets way overrated. Seems like a decent enough stepping stone between the "Figure out what to do for yourself" attitude of the first Zelda to the epic campaign of Ocarina of Time.

    Mario Kart 64- Ive said it a million times- I don't care that it's a knockoff, Crash Team Racing is 10x the game Mario Kart 64 ever was. I realize it came out a little later, but both Gamerankings and Metacritic agree with me.

    Pokemon Snap- This was fun, how did the photographer genre never take off, or even produce a similar game? Fatal Frame doesn't count.

    Starfox 64- By "playing" this, I mean that I wingmanned for Matt Dyer while he played the levels; I mostly read the guide and told him where the shortcuts were and tried to get the elusive all-along-the-top-path series of levels. It never happened. I played it again recently on VC, and while it was enjoyable it didn't do much to make me want to replay.

    Super Mario 64- the DS version broke before I finished it, so my guess is I'll VC this at some point as well. Way to switch up the formula, Nintendo- making the levels mission based rather than finding the exit was genious.

    Super Mario Bros series- Not much to say about the first one, never beat the second, but the third is an awesome game that holds up better than any old game I've ever played.

    Super Mario World- Great stuff, as you promised, but unfortunately came at a time when I didn't feel like exploring all the extra levels. Some day...

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