April 30, 2011

Seven Pounds


Rotten Tomatoes has this movie listed at 29% fresh. Metacritic gives it a 36. The most positive score I could find on Metacritic was an 83, and the displayed excerpt from said reviewer was, "A movie that plays better if you know nothing about it going in." Actually, I knew nothing about this movie going in. And I thought it was a decent and alright movie. A tad slow and confusing at first, but in a way that kept me interested and wondering how everything was all going to fit together. But that doesn't mean that all the entertainment from this movie came from a twist ending or a well-crafted revelation. I actually don't really want to say anything more about it, because like the reviewer said, the less you know going in, the better off you are. An important thing to remember is temporal context; this movie came out at the tail end of a three-year streak of Will Smith movies that saw him portray a lone survivor of an apocalypse (I Am Legend), a triumphant rags-to-riches success story (The Pursuit of Happyness), and a superhero (Hancock). Again, I don't want to ruin anything, but this movie might feature Will Smith at his most over-the-top "awesome," if that vague description makes any sense. Perhaps critics were just ready to rip into him and say, "dude, get off the cross already." Because I've seen a lot of movies both good and bad, and honestly, this one wasn't a 2.9 or 3.6 out of ten. Personally I'd give it a seven or so, and I can even see the case for a four through six. I dunno. If you already know anything about it - plot premise-wise, I guess - then I guess you shouldn't bother seeing this movie because you'll just be annoyed by it. But if you're like I was going in, and very "in the dark," then maybe this is something you'd enjoy too.

Cat and Mouse


I'm a big fan of murder mysteries, and I think James Patterson does them right. When we last left Alex Cross, he had just received a call from super villian Gary Soneji who Cross has imprisoned once before he escaped. This book leads off with Soneji's new kill. Cross spends 1/3 of the book going after Soneji and to his delight, he finds him! Then Soneji kills himself, but not before one last threat to Cross. He will come after Cross, dead or alive. The night after Cross' part for finally defeating Soneji, he and his entire family are brutally beaten by an unknown assailant. In comes, Thomas Pierce, FBI agent on the Mr. Smith case. This is where the book kind of diverges. Pierce is working the Cross case trying to find out who hurt him but also still working the elusive Mr. Smith case. In a classic murder mystery plot point, we find out that Pierce the FBI agent is actually Mr. Smith the serial killer. His first kill was his girlfriend. Cross knew this the entire time and was pretending to be hurt more than he actually was to lure Pierce into his territory. Cross catches Mr. Smith (surprise) but Mr. Smith dies (surprise). Not many of Cross' villains actually live. On a positive note, Cross proposes to his lady love from the last book. I feel like that may end badly if he stays in such a dangerous job. I will surely see.

Harry Potter 4: The Goblet of Fire




Great news! I still <3 Harry Potter. I have seen Harry Potter 4 a bazillion times but never on dvd or bluray. So huzah. This movie is super toll. I'm trying to think of anything to say about it and I can't. It's good. That's all I have for you. I can't even think of anything to criticize. Besides maybe Cho. Harry Potter is too good for hr. Oh also, Robert Pattinson is in this movie and he's not a vampire so that's fun right? He dies though. Sad times for Cedric Diggory. If Harry wasn't so selfless and just took the cup for himself he could have saved an innocent man's life. Oh Harry. Stay tuned for HP5 at some point!

April 29, 2011

Uncharted: Drake's Fortune


Uncharted was a pretty good video game, but it also would have made an excellent summer movie. It really felt like a modern day Indiana Jones flick from start to finish. Main character and Francis Drake descendant Nate had a cocky but likable swagger about him as he performed high-risk stunts, blew away hundreds of evil henchmen, and flirted with the tough but delicate female documentarian who came along for the ride on his latest adventure. Nate also had a wise-cracking older mentor-like sidekick in cigar-puffing Sully and a seedy-acting rival treasure hunter in Eddie. None of these characters ever showed any genuine emotion - fear, anguish, despair - aside from being on a general game-long adrenaline rush. No backstory was given for any pre-existing relationships, and no in-game progression helped develop any of them, either; if this had indeed been a summer action movie, it'd be panned mostly for having flat characters. But then, that'd be fine - people don't see summer action movies for the character relationships! Otherwise there'd be no reason to go see Fast Five tonight, and you can bet your ass I'm going to see Fast Five tonight. And of course, furthermore, this game isn't even a movie - it's a game! The Nathan Drake character has become the butt of plenty of Internet jokes about how lame and stale the current generation of video game heroes is. But it's not as if Mario and Link and Samus - a holy trinity of old school heroes - are fleshed out beyond a few simple generic traits like courage and stoicism. Is Nathan Drake the Dane Cook of video game protagonists? Sure. But that doesn't mean this was a shitty game. It was a great game! It wasn't a flawless game, but the parts that hampered it the most - excessive firefights and very occasional bad camera angles - were flaws in game design rather than in the characters or story. I wish there had been more puzzles and less gun play, but then, I guess I should just go play some more Tomb Raider games. I think most people who both read this blog and have a PS3 have already played this one, but for those of you who haven't, do yourself a favor and check it out. It was relatively short and easy (ten hours, and I never even thought to use a walkthrough) and I've been told the series only gets better in the sequel, which is likely the next game I'll try to remove from my backlog.

April 24, 2011

LittleBigPlanet

LittleBigPlanet is a game the BTown loves the shit out of, and so do a lot of other people. It's one of the killer exclusives for the PS3, and one of the first games I bought when I got my PS3. However, it doesn't seem like a great game for logging purposes- it's a platformer whose main emphasis is on customization, especially creating your own levels and uploading them for everyone to try. But as we all know, logging (in most cases) a game just involves getting through the main campaign as quickly as possible. And that's what I did here. The campaign is really nothing special, it's mostly a way to show off some interesting ideas that people can take in creating their own levels. There's 8 worlds of three levels each, each one with a theme of a different locale on Earth (is LittleBigPlanet not supposed to be Earth?)- the American southwest, Japanese temples, the African serengeti, and so on. Most of these levels were easy to breeze through, even the later ones, but two stuck out for being pretty difficult. One level in the American southwest called "The Mines" features a portion where you grab on to a rotating wheel and let it carry you over a gap- I was aware of the grabbing technique, but I can't remember them ever bringing up that you could grab on to some wheels, so I was understandably stuck at that part for a while. The second was the penultimate level, which ends with a giant rotating wheel of death where I had to guide my sackboy from the center all the way out. You get four tries at each checkpoint to get to the next one, or else you have to restart the level- this part had me restarting the level 6 or 7 times. But no big deal. I finished it off, then beat the final level and an easy boss and just like that the game was logged. I know I should try out some random user-created levels, but I've got more PS3 games to play- plus the sequel to LittleBigPlanet is already out, I'll try user-created levels when I beat that.

April 23, 2011

Treasure Island


Going in, I should have been pretty familiar with this story. I saw Muppet Treasure Island as a kid some fifteen years ago. My fifth grade class used Treasure Island for a play that I was part of. And at some point I had definitely even read a dumbed down kids' version of the story. But in spite of all of this - or perhaps because of all of this - when I picked up Treasure Island a week ago I had little to no recollection of most of the characters and actions I was reading about. So the story was kind of new to me all over again. And it's a good, timeless classic of a story. No complaints about Robert Louis Stevenson's writing this time around, either, unlike in my post about his famous Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde novella. This was just a simple but enjoyable and relatively short (200 pages) book. But Treasure Island is a classic for reasons that go beyond its own limited scope and greatness; it's one of those archetype-defining pieces of fiction that creates (or at least popularizes) so many tropes. "Fifteen men on a dead man's chest." Parrots as pirate pets. Treasure maps where X marks the spot. Marooning and mutiny. The list goes on and on, and so many of these pirate tropes that we take for granted today (and that Disney has built a recent successful movie trilogy on) were actually first put into literature, and hence popular culture, by Stevenson in this very book. It's that legacy that makes Treasure Island iconic; on its own merit, it's really no better than The Dark Frigate.

April 21, 2011

House: Season 6


So, I've been doing really well in terms of hitting my monthly backlog goals. All books (and two extras) and all video games are accounted for, leaving me with nothing but two seasons of HBO television. So why, then, have I spent the last few weeks watching House? I've got no legitimate reason. But then, is reason ever required when it comes to plowing away through one's backlog? Anyway, as I said just over a year ago in my review of Season 5, "Unfortunately, the great finale only made it necessary for Season 6 to start off terribly (no spoilers, but trust me), one of several factors that led me to stop watching House midway through this year." And I stand by the opening statement and the decision; Season 6 did start terribly and it was well worth my time to kick the show to the curb for the second semester of my college senior year. We begin with two episodes of Dr. House in a mental institution, trying to quit his Vicodin addiction cold turkey, once and for all. And boy, does the show suffer because of it. The institution segments with House were boring. The hospital segments without him felt lacking. And even when House finally comes back to the hospital, he's still got to wait around a while before his medical license gets reinstated. So we get a "nice" stretch of several episodes in which House is just hanging around acting petulant while his former diagnostic team sort of struggles without him, but only in the same way they would be struggling with him at the helm anyway. Then there's yet another sloppy main character send off that feels unrealistic, sudden, and silly - a House trademark in recent years, it seems. And the writers get just a little bit too "meta" for comfort, as House drops a terribly forced Mike Tomlin reference near Foreman (played by Tomlin lookalike Omar Epps) and says, of Dr. Hadley, "It's not like she's the hottest woman in the world," a clear reference to the fact that Olivia Wilde had just been bestowed that very honor by Maxim. Once House returned to the diagnostic team and assembled his best crew - a combination of his older crew and his more recent crew - there were a few dull and uninteresting procedural episodes. At that point, I was done for the year. But I'm glad I bought and watched the DVDs (as if there was ever any doubt that I would), because Season 6 began to gather momentum only a few episodes beyond the point I had stopped watching over a year ago. There were a few episodes that broke the formulaic routine that House (like any network procedural) so often employs. Even those standard procedural episodes, however, began to trend upward in terms of overall quality. At least, that's my own personal opinion. The season ended on an extremely high note, too, with an effective form-breaking penultimate episode and an intense and shocking finale that pushed both Hugh Laurie's acting and Dr. House's character development further than I'd ever seen either go. So, thankfully, I am in fact looking forward to Season 7 and however many come after it. Apparently the show may change networks next year for Season 8 - could be reason enough for me to jump back in. But probably not. We'll see how long it takes me to buy and watch Season 7. If I end up doing so this summer, then yes, I'll probably be looking to catch up in time for Season 8. But then, what's wrong with waiting for the DVDs once again? Speaking of which, I just remembered - I still have to watch the fourth and final season of Heroes. Blech.

April 19, 2011

Harry Potter 3: The Prisoner of Azkaban

If you know anything about me, you should know this. I post in bulk. I’m awful at posting when I finish the book, movie, tv show, or video game (jeez who plays those? Not me judging by this blog).

If you are at all intuitive, and you know what, I have faith that you are, you will realize that I would have posted HP3 The Prisoner of Azkaban sometime soon. The great news for you is that time is now.

This was one of my favorite books, and I think the movie did it justice. Harry Potter starts to come into his own as an actor here and he seems to age a lot between HP2 and HP3. Hermione and Ron still have a little growing up to do. I do think Emma Watson is the best actor out of the three though. This movie also has one of my personal favorite characters Lupin who I think is pretty great in the movie as well. It also introduces the scary dementors which are portrayed well in the movie. AKA they are freaking scary. That’s all!

Harry Potter 2: The Chamber of Secrets

So, I heart Harry Potter. I’ve read the books too many times, and I watch the movies anytime they are on HBO or ABC Family is having a marathon. BUT, I have never owned the movie. Thus, I have never officially had it in my backlog. So you would think, judging by this post, that I now have it. But I only sort of have it because it’s Steve’s, but I really wanted to do the posting on this one. So I’m gonna. Deal with it.

Before HP1, I was like “ugh, can’t I just get the first three movies over with so I can watch the best mover ever HP4” I was wrong though. The first movies are still good! HP2 provides you with your last glimpses of Dumbledore 1. I don’t think there is too big of a difference. Some disagree, but oh well. You also begin finding out a little about Voldermort’s past aka Tom Marvolo Riddle. Harry also pulls a sword out of an old hat. Good times follow.

Enjoyable, but the actors are still young and coming into their roles. That’s all I have for you.

Jack and Jill

Jack and Jill

Book 3 of the Alex Cross series, commence! Also, I believe this is a good opportunity to add that James Patterson also writes the currently underground, in the future, hugely popular, Maximum Ride series where we see bird people become the next new vampire craze.

Anywho, this book chronicles Alex Cross’ search for not one but three killers! One killer is brutally murdering children in his very neighborhood at his childrens’ school. This is the case he would love to stay on, but the higher ups put his brilliant mind on the Jack and Jill case who are committing perfect high profile crimes again celebrities and politicians in DC, with the end goal being Mr and Mrs White House.

Wanna know the ending? The continue! It turns out that the children killer is actually a child himself with a severe mental problem. In a final stand off, he kills Cross’ “lady love’s” husband. I’m sure this will set up a budding relationship with her in the next book. If you remember, his last lady love turned out to be the bad guy (bad luck). The Jack and Jill case still puzzles them. The president is attacked and killed, and the “killer” commits suicide. But wait, a clever ruse! This is not the actual killer but someone who the killer told to do the killing. Plot twist yo. Anyways, turns out the killer is an FBI agent and her husband who have been working on the case. Oops. They go to prison and both die mysteriously the next die leaving the case unresolved.

Oh! Important footnote. Cross receives a call from Gary Soneji at the end of the book, the super villain from the first book who escaped from prison and has it out for Cross. Will we see him in the next book? I think yes. (I know yes. I am currently reading it. I’m a cheater.)

Over and out

April 18, 2011

Seeing

With a sizable chunk of my booklog taken care of already this year, I recently started to explore some options on my Kindle. I went on a shopping spree, acquiring over twenty books and a lot of other potentially unbloggable stuff. A number of these books came from a steal I found- 12 novels by Jose Saramago for $20. I posted Blindness last summer and was a fan, and had interest in at least two other books of Saramago's, so I didn't hesitating in making this huge but cheap purchase, after which I immediately started into Seeing, the sequel to Blindness. For those who don't remember, the plot to Blindness is fairly simple- blindness suddenly and inexplicably starts spreading like a disease in a city in Portugal, leading to complete chaos within a few days. Seeing takes place four years later in that same city, people can see again, and it's election day. After all of the ballots are counted up, 70% of them are found to be completely blank. After a stern warning by the government and an impromptu second attempt at an election, even more ballots are left blank the second time. With this the president basically tells the city "shame on you" and the entire government up and leaves the capital city. This setup was similar to Blindness- take a normal, familiar place, introduce a strong gimmick, be it inexplicable blindness or equally inexplicable tremendous voter apathy, and let the story write itself. Nothing that happened in Blindness was too surprising, but it's at times brutal or beautiful and worked very well as a story. Unfortunately Seeing doesn't work nearly as well. You see (ha!), for the entirety of Seeing up to this point, there have been only vague references to the plague of blindness that affected the city four years ago, and I had no problem with that. Seeing seemed to be more of a thematic sequel to Blindness than a direct one. But halfway through the story takes a conspiracy turn- members of the government find out about the one person who could see during the blindness epidemic, and stop at nothing to make him a scapegoat for the current voting crisis. It was a pretty abrupt turn that definitely made me like the book less- what started out with great potential as a criticism of the very idea of 'politics' turned into a slightly more generic thriller. The second half still did have its merits though- checking in on some of the old characters was nice, and the troubled superintendent who becomes the protagonist in the second half may have been the most interesting of any character in either book; still though, I can't help but feel more could have been done to make the two parts connect. I mean, by the second half the question of why people suddenly voted for no one is dropped completely. While Seeing certainly had its share of flaws and wasn't nearly as good as Blindness, I still found it to be an enthralling read and have no problem with the fact that ten more Saramago books exist in my backlog.

Counter-Strike


About a year ago I got a little too invested in the "top [X number] video games of the decade" lists circulating the Internet and decided I needed to play (and more so, own) a number of them. I ended up spending hundreds of dollars in April and May on like two dozen games and my backlog has been exceptionally bloated ever since. Whatever. Today, I crossed this one off my list. Counter-Strike started out as a home-brewed Half-Life mod in 1999 but quickly became so popular that Valve decided to officially incorporate it into the Half-Life franchise and hired its two creators as full-time developers. But the game quickly took on a culture of its own, completely separate from that of Half-Life, and eventually Valve decided to split it off into its own family of games and expansion packs. So when the game was ported to the original Xbox in 2004, it was not done so as Half-Life: Counter-Strike, but simply as Counter-Strike, seen above. I purchased my own copy new for something like eight bucks on Amazon a year back, and now that I've played "through" it, I can see why Amazon had slashed the price so low. Note my use of quotation marks around the word "through." Note them again. The thing is, Counter-Strike was always meant to be a multi-player game in which counter-terrorist teams (CTU, if you use 24 acronyms) oppose terrorist squads up to no good. The terrorists are either trying to plant a bomb somewhere or holding hostages - seriously, those are the only two game types, at least on this port - and the CT forces must stop them from doing so. What makes the game unique, or at least original, in the FPS genre is that matches are quick and there is no regeneration or "re-spawning" once you die. If the terrorists kill you, you're dead until the next round begins - which thankfully is usually within a minute or two. I like that. It adds an element of realism to coming up with actual tactics and strategies. More important than killing is staying alive. I suspect that's a lot like real war, whereas in a ten-minute Halo session you can die twenty times and still call it a good match as long as you had twenty-five kills. In Counter-Strike, you're much more likely to attack from adequate cover and to communicate with teammates to set up cover fire and lay traps for enemies. It seems like it'd be a lot of fun to play with a group of friends. But I'll never know, because the servers for the Xbox version of the game have been taken down for good and the only company I was able to play with this afternoon were AI bots. So I did both tutorial modes and then played through around ten rounds of planting and disarming the bomb, and that about wraps it up. There is no single-player campaign and no story mode to speak of. I'm melancholy about missing the boat on this game when you could actually play it with other people, but I mean, at least my video game backlog got smaller in practically no time at all.

Infamous


Infamous could best be described as a jack of all trades. It is a GTA-style open-world sandbox game that takes place in a dystopian city. It is also a lot like BioShock and Fallout in that karma plays a large role in both the in-game gameplay experience and also the way the story unfolds and the way the other characters perceive and treat you. And the very free-flowing and easy to use control scheme that allows you to climb walls like a monkey and ride across the city on electrical wires like you're Tony Hawk on a skate board absolutely reminded me of Prince of Persia. I guess the worst thing you could say about Infamous is that it lacks its own identity in the gaming world today. All truly great games have one, be it an unforgettable story or innovative gameplay or a unique concept deployed here or there. But Infamous can't boast one of its own, and that's probably the biggest reason that I can't consider Infamous an instant classic or one of the greatest games out there today. Of course, it's still a very good game, as any GTA-BioShock-Price of Persia "clone" should be. I enjoyed it a great deal, lack of "it factor" and all. You play as Cole, an every-man who is at the center of a mysterious blast one day and wakes up with the power to control electricity. Think of him as the guy in Crash 2. Or maybe Pikachu. Regardless, the city becomes quarantined as the government investigates, and suddenly you're thrust into a role of your own choice. Will you become the city's guardian with your new found powers, fighting for what's right? Or will you turn the city into a sandbox and its inhabitants into your playthings as you seek more and more power and glory for yourself? Unlike in BioShock, where the greatest rewards (and trophies and achievements) are given for being a good person, in Infamous there is total balance between both choices. Just make sure to commit to whichever one you choose. There's a karma meter that ranges from "Hero" al the way down to "Infamous," and the greatest powers and abilities are unlocked only by achieving one extreme or the other. I chose evil over good. For one thing, that's how all the GTA games played out, what with all the civilian carnage and wanted levels and all. For another, the evil extreme carries the same name as the game itself; it just felt fitting. And I guess a distant third reason was that so many video games thrust you into the good guy role anyway and I wanted a change of pace. Even though the main story progresses the same way whether you choose to be a hero or a dick, there are little choices to make along the way that affect your reputation. The plot felt a bit zany and confusing at times, but that's forgivable as this was a video game and not a book. Great plots with great characters are the exception (Final Fantasy VI and VII, BioShock) rather than the norm. Anyway, there are 39 regular story missions and there must be at least a hundred side missions. I never went out of my way to do the side missions, but plenty were achievable on the way to the next main mission and so it isn't like I avoided doing them either. There are also a number of collectable items - satellite uplink messages, lightning shards - that make this game a completionist's dream. Or nightmare, I guess. The sequel is due out in June, but I probably won't rush off to buy and play it. Not for lack of interest, but because I still have seventy games in my backlog. Infamous was a lot of fun, but time will tell how memorable it was.

April 13, 2011

The Dark Frigate


Good news: This book was a lot better than most of the Newbery Award winners I've read to date. Bad news: It was still pretty bland and meaningless. Great news: I'm finally done; the backlog is now Newbery-free. There are still a few children's books remaining, but none carry the badge of assured shittiness that is the Newbery Award. Now, this book was published in 1924, and it was only the third Newbery winner. And I guess back then, kids' books were considered good if they were exciting and filled with adventure. (And not about, say, mice and crickets chit-chatting in a subway, or mice and birds discussing government labs.) The Dark Frigate is a pirate story. As far as pirate stories go, it was nothing special. Boy sets sail, pirate crew abducts ship, boy resists piracy, pirates kill most of original crew except for boy for some reason, authorities capture pirates, boy cannot prove own innocence, touched pirate captain vindicates boy's claims of innocence, pirates are killed, boy sets sail once more. You know, the usual. Whatever. I'm all done with the quick and easy but dull and frustrating Newbery winners side quest. Phew.

April 12, 2011

Angela's Ashes


Angela's Ashes is a memoir by author Frank McCourt about his childhood in Ireland in the 1930s and '40s. It made for an informative and interesting read. I had no idea how shitty everyday life still was for Irish people this side of the potato famine. But McCourt spares no details, filling the reader in on the gritty and gruesome details of his impoverished and tragedy-ridden childhood. His father was a hopeless drunk. His mother was a downtrodden and defeated Irish Catholic housewife and mother. His house was a shit hole - literally, as it was the only house on his street to contain a lavatory, and it often flooded. Three of his six siblings died very young. Several of his friends and classmates did too. The whole thing read like an over-the-top parody of Irish culture, and I was amazed and partially aghast to read a first-hand account of such stereotypes as total realities. But throughout it all, McCourt used plenty of dry humor and wit to add comic relief to the story of his childhood and to remind us all that even when born and raised in poverty, children, with their naivete and innocence, can't help but create fun and mischief and such. It was clear that no matter how horrible his childhood was by most modern standards, McCourt has nothing but love and respect for his homeland. The book ends with Frank leaving for America at the age of nineteen, and McCourt has also written a sequel  memoir ('Tis) about his life as a twenty-something immigrant in America - college student, Korean War soldier, husband, etc. - but I don't know if I've got enough interest in his life story to continue reading it. Even in this book, I found the earlier chapters more enjoyable than the later ones in which a teenage Frank begins to explore his sexuality, rebel against the teachings of the Catholic Church, and enlighten himself in a number of other ways. Still, this was a pretty decent book, and if you're into memoirs, the 1930s and '40s, or Irish Catholic culture, consider checking it out. Or maybe just see the movie.

April 10, 2011

The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle

I can't remember where I had Murakami's The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle recommended to me (probably SomethingAwful) but I'm glad I got around to reading it. While the ending certainly veered off in a direction I wasn't expecting, it was still a very enjoyable and though provoking experience throughout. It's set in the suburbs of Tokyo in the 80's, yet has a very familiar feel to it- Murakami sprinkles some pop-culture references throughout, and for the most part there's little reason to think this couldn't have been set in any middle-class area. Unemployed narrator Toru Okada begins his day normally- fixing some spaghetti and searching for his lost cat, when he receives a call from a woman claiming to be from his past- Toru has no idea who she is. Then his wife out of the blue all but forces him to see a psychic... to talk about his cat (I realize this sounds like it could be crap, but trust me, it works). Eventually more and more odd things start happening to Toru, starting with his real life and eventually in his subconscious. I'd go into more detail, but it's pretty hard to do that without spoiling some major plot points. I've spoiled plenty of books on this blog, but one as good as The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle deserves to be a surprise when you first read it. It's 600 pages, and the ending leaves plenty unresolved, but there's still plenty to do with the book after it's done- I've enjoyed reading several different interpretations in reviews online. I haven't settled on one I agree with (and I probably won't), but I can assure you that more Murakami will be posted on the Back-Blog, probably soon.

April 8, 2011

Portrait of an Artist, as an Old Man


Joseph Heller's final novel was certainly an anachronism in comparison with his other six. It was very short (230 pages instead of 400-600), very lacking in structure or plot, and very autobiographical and nonfictional. It was very much an afterthought, in fact. After completing Closing Time, his self-described "summing up," Heller apparently got bored and decided to write another book; had he not died of a heart attack at 76 in 1999, I'm sure he would have written yet another. The protagonist of this career epilogue is a writer who has always struggled with being able to write a novel that could live up to the precedent set by his very first novel. Sound familiar? Heller doesn't even pretend that said "fictional" writer isn't himself - not that there's anything wrong with that. What follows is a series of "false starts," if you will; not-Heller begins to write a story and gets anywhere from a few paragraphs to a few pages into it before giving up in despair. It isn't really writer's block. It's more of a sensation that everything he's writing has either been written before (by him or someone else) or isn't good enough to build a story out of. And I see where he's coming from. One of not-Heller's rough drafts is the story of Abraham and Isaac (the one in which God demands that Abraham kill his only son, but then let's him live after Abraham is ready to go through with it - you know, another feel-good Old Testament tale) retold from Isaac's point of view. I'll admit, it had a lot of potential, but then, the opening pages of a book often do; how to stretch and expand good ideas into entire novels is the real issue. Anyway, as I read not-Heller's draft of the Isaac story, I remembered Heller's God Knows, a re-telling in contemporary language of many biblical stories from King David's point of view. But before long, not-Heller snapped out of the draft and thought, "this is way too similar to that book I wrote about David." (Again, there is never once a pretense that not-Heller isn't Heller.) I actually wondered to what extent, if any, Portrait of an Artist was a work of fiction. Were these not-Heller originals just actual failed Heller projects through the years? It seems probable, right? Other ideas that get toyed with and tweaked are a re-telling of Kafka's Metamorphosis ("There's nothing to expand upon here," realizes not-Heller), a human-history-arching story told by an immobile but omnipresent gene in every cell of every human being (scrapped for a number of reasons including its lack of a compelling narrator), a book in which Tom Sawyer encounters Mark Twain (way too much meta-fiction for not-Heller to handle - irony intentional?), and a book about all the Greek gods getting jealous and angry at one another (which was abandoned simply for lack of direction). At their best, these stories were cocktease-esque sneak peaks at Heller projects that never came to fruition. At their worst, they wasted ten uninteresting pages of Heller's final novel. The book ends abruptly (for no reason, given the short length and given that Heller's death shortly after its completion was due to a heart attack rather than any illness he could have foreseen ending his life) with not-Heller deciding that his next book will simply be a book about all of his failed attempts at writing another great book - this very book you've just read, in fact! Blech. I wasn't wholly satisfied with this final offering from the author of my favorite book ever, but then, neither was he, if not-Heller's thoughts on his struggles are any indication. But then, at least Portrait of an Artist was short and simple. It can't be my least favorite Heller book because I never expected much, good or bad, from it in the first place. Again, it always felt like a simple tacking-on to me. Like Griffey's short-lived 2010 season, or Season 9 of Scrubs. (By the way, least favorite Heller book? God Knows. But this is starting to turn into a post best suited for another blog...) I'd be remiss to end this post without some kind of tribute to Heller; I've now posted six of his books on this blog (tops for any author) and now I'll never get to post about him again, except if I'm drawing a comparison or unless I someday read his memoirs or his collection of short stories - both distinct possibilities! But for now, the backlog is Heller free for the first time since I finished Catch-22. Oh, fuck it. I'll leave you with this:
There was only one catch and that was Catch-22, which specified that a concern for one's own safety in the face of dangers that were real and immediate was the process of a rational mind. Orr was crazy and could be grounded. All he had to do was ask; and as soon as he did, he would no longer be crazy and would have to fly more missions. Orr would be crazy to fly more missions and sane if he didn't, but if he was sane he had to fly them. If he flew them he was crazy and didn't have to; but if he didn't want to he was sane and had to. Yossarian was moved very deeply by the absolute simplicity of this clause of Catch-22 and let out a respectful whistle.

"That's some catch, that Catch-22," he observed.

"It's the best there is," Doc Daneeka agreed.

April 6, 2011

Operation Armored Liberty

Way back when I beat A Link to the Past, my original fat grey DS, a gift from Trev, basically broke in half. I had gotten plenty of use out of it, and now with some money to burn, I decided to purchase a DSi to keep playing DS games. But what about GBA games? After all, I knew there were several Castlevania and Final Fantasy games I wanted to play on the GBA, but now had no system to play them on. I turned to eBay, and got myself a slick Game Boy Micro. I really like it- it's small enough to fit in my pocket easily, but powerful enough to play some great epic games- such as the recently beaten Final Fantasy V. But with my Micro game something terrible. A toss-in game that for some reason made my Micro cheaper than all other Micros on eBay. That game is Operation: Armored Liberty. It's an almost carbon copy of the SNES game Garry Kitchen's Super Battletank: War in the Gulf, which apparently was a pretty mediocre game when it was released nearly 20 years ago. Why it got a remake/port, I have no idea. The game puts you inside a tank with a first-person view, rolling around Iraq, avoiding mines and shooting at other tanks and helicopters. And that's it. You're put on a map, and you slowly roll from one target to another, shooting at it until it blows up and moving on. A lack of any variety whatsoever kills any fun you'll have with this game. The graphics are fine. The controls are actually pretty good. A fast-travel option thankfully cuts down the time it takes to get from one target to another. But it's just the same thing, over and over. You never fight more than one thing at a time, and at no point is anything resembling a "strategy" needed. I breezed through 10 levels and got the credits to roll within 2 hours. Now it's time to move on and forget that I wasted this beautiful afternoon playing a shitty video game.

Closing Time


When I was fourteen years old, I read Catch-22. I can't remember who or where I'd gotten the recommendation from, or if it was somehow a total blind whim. But I loved it. I've re-read it two or three times (something I rarely do with old books) since then, and I still love it. It is without question my favorite book. And back when I was fourteen, I bought its sequel, Closing Time, and had very high expectations. The sequel simply didn't deliver on any account and I abandoned it after about 100 of its 464 pages. Now, let's fast forward eight years to the present day. I've been reading through Joseph Heller's novels in order of publication. Every few months, you can find one on this very blog, starting back in October of 2009 with Heller's second book, Something Happened. That book, too, was very, very different from Catch-22. But at twenty-one years of age and not fourteen, I could at least appreciate the book in spite of such differences. And as I read more and more of Heller's books I got a bigger and better picture of the evolution of Heller as an author. Naturally, I also did my fair share of research on the man's life beyond what he offered up in his books. So when it came time for me to attempt Heller's sixth novel - this novel - for a second time, I had some very different expectations than I did eight years ago. Not tempered expectations, per se, but a new outlook on what the book could and would be about and how it would be written. And frankly, the whole thing was kind of a mess. It didn't start out that way. It actually started out very slowly. Yossarian, the protagonist of Catch-22, is seventy years old and very much heading into the home stretch of his life. So, too, are all of his friends and peers (including several other recurring characters from Catch-22, which was set during World War II). And so is the twentieth century, and along with it, the golden age of America. It's "closing time," so to speak. I read a lot of reviews before, whilst, and after reading Closing Time, and the best phrase I can remember, in comparing it to Catch-22, went something like, "Catch-22 was a frantic young man's novel about how to stay alive; Closing Time is a calm old man's novel about how to die." I can't remember the reviewer's name, but in a nutshell, he nailed it. Heller divides the book neatly between Yossarian and two other World War II veterans. There are shades of Heller in all three. That in and of itself isn't strange; many authors base several of their characters on different components of themselves. But while Yossarian is Heller's superego and all of his story is narrated in the third person, the chapters in which either of the other two men - Lew and Sammy - are the protagonist are told in the first person. And stranger still, there is a reference made midway through the book to a "Joey Heller" who Sammy remembers going to war with. We're not just dealing with different versions of Heller, but with different layers of him within his own novel. It was never really confusing, so to speak, but it seemed fairly unlike anything Heller had written up to that point (1994) and I can't say it added much to the story. But it didn't detract, either. Anyway, the Sammy and Lew characters spend most of their time speaking nostalgically about their childhood on Coney Island and their timeless war stories and memories. And they do so without any added humor or wit; this is simply Heller reflecting on his past through a very, very thin fourth wall. The doublespeak and irony that sprang from every page of Catch-22 are entirely absent from these passages about days gone by both good and bad. But the Yossarian side of the story - and namely, the parts of it in which Yossarian interacts with fellow Catch-22 veteran Milo - still contains plenty of the dry humor lacking elsewhere. But again, that's only for half of the novel. It's really as if these are two separate novels; one a fun and creative "Where are they now?" take on a few Catch-22 characters, the other a nonfictional memoir of Heller's own life. I don't get it, and neither do most of the people who wrote the reviews I read. And in the final fifty pages or so, an already-strange narrative method becomes jarred completely loose by several ridiculous and over-the-top moments that felt far more Vonnegut than Heller. (Actually, Heller even wrote "Kurt Vonnegut" himself into the narrative, albeit briefly and without any real consequence.) A man becomes a highly-sought WMD when it is discovered that his urine contains radioactive isotopes; we briefly visit hell and find FDR and JFK; two characters who died in Catch-22 fly their plane through the sky, conversing with one another, completely aware that they are ghosts; and the president begins a nuclear holocaust when he mistakes reality for one of his favorite video games. It's all just so utterly bizarre. Catch-22 was full of bizarre moments, but none of them involved supernatural phenomena or a Dr. Strangelove-style apocalypse. (Heller wrote in a character named "Dr. Strangelove" as well.) There's very little to love here, and yet, I want to love this book. I really do. I don't love it, and most critics didn't love it (reactions "ranged" from slightly negative to slightly positive), but something about it makes me want to love it. Perhaps (well, more than likely) it's my respect for Heller himself. Maybe he knew what he was doing. Maybe he had a ton of ideas for more novels, but recognized that he wouldn't have time to finish writing multiple books; he died just five years after this book's publication and it's very clear that death was on his mind as he wrote what was then supposed to be his final work. ("This is my summing-up," Heller stated in an interview prior to the book's release.) So maybe Heller just said, "fuck it," and threw together his Catch-22 follow-up, his memoirs, and his military-industrial satire together without much care for how well the pieces fit together. Probably not, but still - maybe. That theory is the best I can conjure up to defend Heller's "summing-up," though. Closing Time wasn't a bad book. But the whole was far lesser than the sum of its parts. Whatever. I'm glad to have read it and I think I can appreciate it at least for what it is. I'll start Heller's final novel (a short one, relatively speaking) as soon as tomorrow. But for now, it's bed time. Now, go read Catch-22. Really, just do it. It'll change your life.

April 3, 2011

Trigun



Original Story written and illustrated by Yasuhrio Nightow. Animation by the Madhouse studio.

Vash the Stampede is the The Humanoid Typhoon and has a bounty of $$60,000,000,000 on his head. Not because he's a vicious murderer or some kind of criminal, but because his actions are costing the Bernardelli Insurance Society a to pay for every claim that he caused. Which is usually the destruction of whole cities.

And that's where we start off. We follow Meryl and Milly, two insurance claim investigator, trying to find out who this Vash character is, and to follow him around, and keep him from causing so much destruction. Vash isn't really causing any damage, but people trying to kill him are. Everyone wants that Sixty Billion Double Dollars, and are trying anything to finish him off. Vash is conflicted though. He is an amazing shot and seems to dodge bullet's at will, but he has a strong dislike of death. So he's the classic character that, while he's could be and probably once was a killer, respects life too much to ever take it. So the hijinks ensue.

For the first half of the 26 episode series, it follows the plot formula like this: Meryl and Milly are looking for Vash the Stampede, and while they are looking for him, this blonde man in a red coat will bump into them and inadvertently cause some trouble. The girls won't believe that this clumsy oaf is Vash, but everyone else will, so suddenly he's running around, while people shoot, bomb and try to score the extreme fortune on his head. The second half of the series focuses on the past of Vash, this mysterious peaceful man who seems to attract trouble where ever he goes.

The whole story takes place on a desert planet that humans have colonized 200 years previously, so anime is also put into the Space Western, something Stan saw back in Firefly. The Space Western really is just a Western that has small bits of ancient technology or uses advanced weaponry that mimics old timey western revolvers. Trigun has much more Science Fiction aspect from it, especially when it starts describing the colonization and Vash's past, even so devoting whole episodes as flashbacks.

Trigun is an anime's anime. It is filled with clichés that make anime great and annoying. Most American anime fans love Trigun, because it was exposed to Americans before anime really moved over to the Western shores. Animated in 1998, it has rich painted backgrounds, and a strong contrast between scenery and cell. I remember my only real brush of Trigun was as a freshman in highschool. I had to stay up late because I had to call in my potato baby at 3am, so I just stayed up experiencing the Adult Swim programming block. Apparently I watch the final episode of Trigun six years ago. Not really understanding the plot, I enjoyed it for gritty and pretty style of drawing and action. This isn't an anime for everyone, but it is for the fan of animes.

April 1, 2011

Pain


Yeah, know what? Let's just call this game beaten. Pain is a downloadable game for the PS3 that I was introduced to years ago at a friend's house. The concept is simple. Too simple. Just fling a person across a city with minimal control over his flight path and try to create as much havoc as possible. The game must be a cash cow, because in addition to the two levels and characters that come standard, there are dozens of levels and characters to purchase for an additional charge. Fuck that. I unlocked every version of the "Downtown" area (the game's only free one) and tried a few of the other game modes before realizing that there really wasn't all that much to this game. Truth be told, I bought it largely due to a new patch that allows the game to be played in 3D. Remember, in my Shrek post I talked at length about 3D movies and TV shows and how they really aren't that much better or cooler than regular movies and TV shows. But 3D gaming is absolutely something I could get behind. Unfortunately, only a few of the game modes in Pain offer 3D support, and none of them is the main game in which you just try to ruin as much stuff and create as high a score as possible. But when dabbling just a bit in the 3D modes, I was impressed. I guess I didn't expect not to be, but there's still something reassuring about playing a 3D video game and not having it suck. So yeah. Pain was fun, but only for like an hour or so. There's just no real replay value here, and replay value is exactly what you'd want from a game like this one.

March 2011 Recap

I logged 13 things in March, making it my fifth-worst month (quantitatively) out of the twenty months this blog has existed. Sweeney made three posts, tying his own all-time low in the same amount of time. Webber posted once, tying his own all-time low (a low he has achieved nine times in fifteen months, by the way). Marissa and Trevor each posted only twice. Brian was silent for the first time ever. Keith posted nothing for the second straight month.

Guys. March was terrible.

Granted, we have our excuses. Jobs got in the way. Springtime got in the way. Brithday parties and family dinners and budding relationships and business trips and funerals got in the way. Life happens. That's cool. That makes sense. And, yeah, I know that the things we read, watched, and beat this month were in general much longer and more effort-evoking than the things we've read, watched, and beaten in other months. Still, we can do better than 21 combined posts, right? I know that I can on my own, in a good month.

Last month, I said I wanted to use the month of March to do a bit of "spring cleaning," so to speak. When the month began I was in the midst of eight video games, four books, two TV seasons, and that Shrek 3D set. I finished off one game, two books, both seasons, and the Shrek movies, giving me a 6/15 mark on my spring cleaning. That's really about as well as I expected to do (although only finishing one of eight video games is, I'll admit, frustrating). I liked the break from my usual system of creating monthly goals. That said, in April, I'll return to specific goals. Let's see them!
  • Closing Time - I'm roughly 250/460 pages in, and this is the top reading priority for the month.
  • Portrait of an Artist, as an Old Man - Because why not finish off the Heller collection once and for all?
  • Angela's Ashes - I'm Ireland-bound in May, so it'd be cool to get this partially-Ireland-set book read before then.
  • The Sopranos: Season 2 - The "roommate" and I just watched the first episode of this 13-episode season. If I can't finish it this month, it's her fault entirely.
  • The Corner - This six-episode HBO miniseries may be just the jumping off point that I need in order to get back into The Wire.
  • Pain - I'm not sure what constitutes "beating" this PS3 download. Perhaps I've already done so.
  • Infamous - Speaking of PS3 and spring cleaning, it's time to actually play through this game.
  • Counter-Strike - For literally no reason aside from its brevity and my desire to get back into gaming. Besides, it's not like this shooter is getting any less dated.
That's eight specific goals. Factor in several movies and a random inspiration or two, and I've got myself a solid month. What do the rest of you plan on logging before May Day?