Madden NFL 09

(Disclaimer: Please excuse the excessive amounts of Brett Favre already included in this post. Sorry. Truly, I am sorry.) So this past August, I flirted excessively with the idea of buying and playing Madden NFL 10, but the sheer weight of my backlog prevented me from making such a purchase. Then, just a couple weeks ago, one of my roommates acquired Madden 09 from a friend who had acquired it for free through a parent. Neither wanted the game, and I was told it could be mine for the low, low price of one slice of cake. (Sold!) Now, everyone would probably agree that in order to "beat" a football game, you've got to play through a season and win the Super Bowl. No arguments here. Still, I set another (lesser) goal, and said to myself, "the bare minimum thing I can do is [this]." What was "this," you ask? Right the wrong that was the '09 Patriots season. For those not in the know, my beloved Pats lost their captain and best player, perennial MVP candidate Tom Brady, and still managed to be led to an 11-5 record by career backup Matt Cassel. But they missed the playoffs. Meanwhile, the perpetually overhyped and underperforming San Diego Chargers went 8-8 and made the playoffs. Even Colts fans cried foul, as the Chargers then Hosted the 12-4 Colts in a playoff game which the Colts lost in overtime without ever having seen the ball. In short, fuck the '08 NFL season. My goal, then, was to make things right by making the playoffs with Matt Cassel leading the charge. First things first; I altered Brady statistically down from a 99 rating to a 35 overall. (I figured even gimpy ACL-less Brady was still 35 points better than nothing). I made Jerod Mayo a little bit better (he was rated far too low!), I made Laurence Maroney a little bit worse (he was rated way too high), and I improved Cassel's ratings from backup levels to those of a decent starter. But enough about the offseason; let's move on to the preseason! I decided to play all four preseason games to get a feel for the new Madden games, having no played any extensively since the 2004 offering. It took a while for me to warm up to some of the changes made to the series, and ultimately, I'm unsure whether or not I liked '09 better than the decade's earlier offerings, and from a franchise that promises every year that enormous upgrades have been made, I'm not so sure that that's okay. Still, the game was by no means bad, even if certain aspects could be described as "quirky" at best. The coolest new feature, undoubtedly, was called something like "EA Sports Rewind." It was essentially a one-time mulligan on almost any play. Didn't mean to throw that game-ending pick? Use your rewind, and the play will start all over. Other team just score on an 80-yard play? Use the rewind and suddenly, no they didn't. This little feature is something everyone who has ever played Madden - or any sports game - has wanted to have. I went 4-0 in the preseason, and my "My Skill" levels increased accordingly. This is probably the second-coolest "newer" feature I saw in all of Madden 09. Rather than playing every game on one of four levels (rookie, pro, all-pro, or all-Madden), players have the option of playing on the "My Skill" level, an adaptive system that changes the difficulties of various meta-games such as running, passing, run defense, and pass defense. Run successfully, and your "My Skill" will reflect it by increasing your running difficulty. Definitely a very cool and long-overdue feature. But also a pain in the ass. I'll share why as our story continues. At any rate, I came chagrin out of the gate winning my first four regular season games with ease. Then along came those bastard Chargers. I lost that game in overtime, blowing several opportunities to put it away along the way. I came back with several wins until it was time for the big Colts showdown. The Colts were undefeated at this point in my season. And undefeated they remained, as Peyton and his boys put an absolute shellacking on my team. Now, remember that "My Skill" feature I was gushing about earlier? As the season wore on and my record got better and better (save for the two aforementioned losses), the games got harder and harder. Eventually, things got too hard; I closed out the regular season by losing two of my final three games to Buffalo and Oakland. A disappointing finish, certainly. But, at 12-4, Matt Cassel had done it; it was playoff time. I had earned a first round bye, and my first game happened to be against those awful, no-good, terrible San Diego Super Chargers. I wanted to wipe the floor with them, still angry over my overtime loss in the regular season, and still upset that the real version of the team had made the playoffs last season with an 8-8 record. I ended up getting destroyed. Three or four times, in fact. I only got more and more pissed off (naturally) every time I'd blow a lead by throwing a pick or being unable to stop them from marching down the field and scoring. But I wasn't entirely to blame - all of my "My Skill" levels had ventured into the most difficult setting of all: all-Madden. I finally caved and played on all-pro instead of all-Madden, and bested those God-forsaken Chargers once and for all. Bitch about that one, LT. You fucker. Sorry. Moving on, it was AFC Championship time, and Peyton's 15-1 Colts were to be my gracious hosts for the affair. I didn't even fuck around here; I played on "pro" and decimated my worthier rivals. Super Bowl time. My opponent? Somewhat surprisingly, the New Orleans Saints. I decided it was only right for me to play this game, my final game, on my "My Skill" level. And what a game it was. It had a little bit of everything - big plays, big returns, missed PATs, two-point conversions, two minute drills, and costly turnovers. In the end, I prevailed by two touchdowns (although the game had been tied as late as the third quarter). I had done it; I had beaten Madden NFL 09. More importantly, I had made things right for the 2008 Patriots and their fearless zero-turned-hero leader, my boy, Matt Cassel. As if by divine intervention, the final screen of the postgame celebration was one of Cassel standing alone, head tilted back, arms spread out, screaming at the top of his lungs with all the exuberance in the world. The cherry on top? He was named Super Bowl MVP. Now that's a football season. Good night, everyone. Sleep easy. I know I will.