Thomas Was Alone

Stan recently posted about Thomas Was Alone, and the game is so short and straight-forward that I don't have much to elaborate on. It's extremely minimalist, as you simply navigate squares and rectangles around through quick puzzles while a British narrator gives the shapes voice and personality, as well as a storyline. It's over in a couple hours, and a hundred levels, and while it doesn't beat out Braid for my favorite indie game, it's certainly worth a play. To make this post worthwile, I'll go a little more in depth on the gameplay itself. You start off with one little rectangle, Thomas, and for the first ten levels Thomas is indeed alone. He simply moves back and forth and jumps pretty high until he lands in his own little rectangular exit-hole. Eventually Thomas meets another rectangle, Chris, one who's a little smaller and can't jump as high as him. This introduces the fourth and final necessary control, as a button push allows you to switch between which shape you want to control. This is also when the narration really started to get fun, as you learn Chris seriously resents how low his jump is in comparison with Thomas, and pretty quickly these generic monochrome shapes develop very human personalities. As you move forward you get shapes with varying properties- ones that can double-jump, or float in water, or let players bounce high off of them like a trampoline, and more. Eventually you've got a decent-sized crew of shapes working together to get out of whatever weird set of puzzles/experiments they've found themselves in. Credit's due to the game for having some challenging puzzles at the end but not giving a ridiculous difficulty curve that so many games have to pad out their length. I liked Thomas Was Alone plenty, but I probably won't invest in the DLC. Not any time soon, at least.

Christine

Most of the Steven King books I've read have skewed towards the 'epic'- the Dark Tower and Talisman series have spanned multiple books; The Stand and It dealt with the possibility of the world being destroyed in different ways, and 11/22/63 and Under The Dome were just lengthy monsters to get through. Even The Long Walk, while relatively short, certainly had a lot of emotional weight to it. So here's probably the lightest of Steven Kings books I've read so far, and the one with the cheesiest premise: Christine. You could say the book is about a bit of a high-school love 'square' of sorts- popular jock Dennis loves the beautiful new girl in town, Leigh; Leigh against all odds loves dweeby Arnie, who is also Dennis' best friend; and while Arnie dates Leigh, he really only has eyes for Christine. The problem of course, is that Christine is Arnie's car. Yeah, just like Leigh somehow fell hard for the ugly Arnie, Arnie fell in love with an ugly old Plymouth Fury and despite everyone's wishes, he focuses all of his time on fixing up his car. Another problem: The car is possessed by the spirit of its former owner, and can drive itself, and kill anyone it feels stands in the way of it's messed-up "relationship" with Arnie, especially his girlfriend Leigh. Understandably, hijinks ensue. I did still like Christine even if it was a harder pill to swallow than most of King's plots. It did let him write at length about the relationship between man and automobile, especially old hot-rods, and when King gets going on a subject like that he can really get interesting with it- is it creepy that they often get girls' names? How does the car that breaks up Dennis and Arnie's friendship feel like an interloping girlfriend, even moreso than the actual girl that shows up and dates both guys in the span of a few months? There's a whole lotta metaphorical meaning to the car, so even if the premise is a little cheesy, there's plenty I'll remember about Christine. My only real beef was a weird structure to the narrative I didn't like. For the first quarter of the book, Dennis is our narrator. Then for the next half, we get an omniscient third-person narrator. Finally for the last quarter, Dennis returns again. It sort of makes sense as Dennis is 'out of commission' for a while there, but I would have preferred if King had stuck to one voice. Still though, Christine as a whole was pretty solid. The quest to finish the King booklog continues!

Evil Dead 2

I don't have time for as long a post here as I'd like to make, but I'd rather post this now while Evil Dead 2 is sort of fresh on my mind than post it a few days from now. (We're moving to a new apartment tomorrow, and God only knows when we'll have Internet access again.) I watched this movie two nights ago and found myself confused right off the bat. Ash, the main character from The Evil Dead, is heading back to a cabin in the woods with his girlfriend. Is this a new girlfriend? Is this the same cabin? Didn't Ash die at the end of the first movie? Eventually, I realized that Evil Dead 2 was just spending its first ten minutes or so recapping - and retconning - the events of the first movie. What followed was an entirely new movie... except, not really. Raimi included plenty of scenes from the first Evil Dead, such as a possessed woman in the cellar banging away at trap doors held back by loose chains, or a woman being attacked and dragged away by tree limbs. As such, a number of people refer to Evil Dead 2 as a partial remake of The Evil Dead and not a true sequel. I'll just call it a very similar movie with a lot of the same scenes and gags and an even more manic tone. In my post on the first movie nine months ago, I noted that The Evil Dead was as fun as it was frightening, but not quite campy. Let me be clear - Evil Dead 2 is totally and shamelessly campy. But that isn't a bad thing. I mean, look at this:

Or this:

Or th- no, you know what? Just do a YouTube search for "Evil Dead 2." There are at least a dozen great over-the-top clips out there, which is a whole lot for an 84-minute movie.

When Evil Dead 2 ended, I wasn't sure if I liked it as much as the original. Where the first movie had been an earnest attempt at a low-budget horror movie that wasn't afraid to have some fun along the way, this remake-sequel just seemed to play up the same old gags in a much goofier manner, and that didn't really sit right with me. It struck me as lazy, almost, as though Raimi, Bruce Campbell, and the rest of the original Evil Dead folks had run out of ideas for new movies, but wanted to go back and redo their rookie effort, laughing at it along the way. But I've sat on it for a few days, I've let the movie digest, so to speak, and I've come around. So what if this movie can't tell if it's a sequel or a remake? So what if it was way over the top and campy an goofy? It was fun, dammit, and that's all a horror movie needs to be. I mean, have you seen those clips yet?

Gran Torino

Hard to believe this movie's already five years old, but here it is. Gran Torino was the "biggest" movie from the last decade that I'd never seen, according to IMDb popularity metrics. (That new honor belongs to The Bourne Ultimatum, which I have far less interest in ever seeing.) When I pointed this out to two friends, months ago, each of them told me independently that I really had to see it. And they were right, and I'm glad I did. Clint Eastwood is a gruff, angry, retired racist. He grunts "get off my lawn!" and points his shotgun at minorities from time to time. His wife has just died and his kids and grandkids are ungrateful and distant. He is a Korean War veteran still stubbornly hanging around a declining Detroit neighborhood quickly filling up with poor folks and gang violence. He's a fascinating character, really, in that he is every bit the stereotypical "bitter angry old man" trope, but he's portrayed as an utter badass and a small-time hero. He's Clint Eastwood, after all.

The first half of the film sees our protagonist spewing vitriolic racism at the neighborhood kids who are up to no good, and it had an interesting effect on me as a viewer. On the one hand, the degree of his contempt for Asians and black kids made me uncomfortable by default. On the other, these kids were doing things like stealing cars and assaulting women, so I couldn't help but think, "yeah, you tell those fuckers off!" as he laced into them with profanities and slurs. But - back to the other hand - I caught myself smiling as an old white guy berated minorities and immediately went back to feeling uncomfortable. Was this a rare peak at some underlying latent racism? Or - with these kids clearly in the wrong and my enjoyment coming largely from them being put in line, derogatorily or otherwise - was this a case of white guilt? Like, was I supposed to be upset with Eastwood's character's racism, or glad to see some vigilante justice? Or was that part of the movie's thematic intent? To make me waver uncomfortably on race issues? To force me to see the hero as a deeply flawed hero at best?

I'm probably overthinking it. Sadly, most of the rest of the movie wasn't even worth thinking about. It was entertaining and touching enough, but from the halfway point or so, Gran Torino stopped being a character study of an old cranky would-be hero and started being a story about an old man becoming a reluctant father figure to the poor Asian kid next door. It all ended way too quickly (which is a compliment in a way, considering how many contemporary movies drag on and wear out their welcome during the second act) and frankly felt a little contrived. I'm supposed to believe that this unapologetic angry racist who ignores and detests his own progeny would ultimately come to love this Chinese teenager with gang ties next door? It's touching and all, but - call me cynical - none of it rang true to the initial incarnation of Eastwood's character. And I'm all for character development, but there's a limit. If you're going to start with a 78-year-old widower who's openly hated Asians since the 1950s and end up with a 78-year-old willing to risk his life for the sake of his Asian neighbor, you better tell a hell of a convincing story that gets us from Point A to Point B. And I don't think Gran Torino quite succeeded on that mark.

Of course, by pointing out shortcomings, I don't mean to detract from the film as a whole. Gran Torino was interesting and engaging, and that's all it takes to be a special movie worth seeing.

Devil May Cry 2

The first Devil May Cry game I played left me a little underwhelmed, which seems like my own fault since it was revolutionary when it came out in 2001, but has been imitated many times over since then. Still though, I could recognize the appeal- the combat was fun, there's a nice focus on style and combos, and the cocky protagonist Dante felt like an early incarnation of Travis Touchdown. I recently tried out the second game in the Devil May Cry series knowing that fans like to pretend it didn't happen, which is understandable. The series was shifted in-house to a completely different development team and rushed out without much of a quality check; Dante has gone from cool and funny to a boring stoic bad-ass; and gameplay-wise the cramped rooms of the castle in the first game have given way to an expansive city with not all that much to do, thus making combat significantly easier- a huge chunk of bosses could be be beaten by standing far away and repeatedly shooting them with unlimited-ammo guns. The lower difficulty is seen as a negative to most, but it's kinda a positive to me when my goal is simply to power through all of my games as fast as possible. Still though, Devil May Cry 2 really brought nothing new to the table and made several aspects of the first game worse, so while I didn't hate the game, there's really no reason to recommend it.

Kingdom of Heaven

It took me three nights to do so, but I've finally finished watching Ridley Scott's Kingdom of Heaven, a historical epic set in Jerusalem during the Crusades. I went into the movie with very little knowledge about it beyond that it had received "mixed reviews" back in 2005. I figured, best case, something along the lines of Braveheart and Gladiator, an amazing movie that would just resonate with me down to the core. And worst case? Something similar to but shorter and more palatable than Lawrence of Arabia. What I got was something in the middle - a decent and enjoyable but at times slow and boring heavily fictionalized biopic based on a real historical figure. Orlando Bloom as Balian of Ibelin, ladies and gentlemen! Bloom's performance kind of stands in as a metaphor for the entire movie: adequate, and not bad, but leaving me wanting something more. Like, on the one hand, the movie featured Liam Neeson as a father and mentor figure, and it had an incredible and impressive battle scene at its climax. On the other hand, Edward Norton shows up during the middle third to play an old king with leprosy, in the weirdest casting choice I can remember seeing in a big budget historical epic. There were some double crosses in there and I think there was supposed to be a love story, or at least a romantic subplot, but none of it really registered with me as anything more than heavy tropes. The biggest aspect for which Kingdom of Heaven deserves credit was its heavier and slightly more sophisticated theme compared to other films of its genre. I love Braveheart and Gladiator as I said, among many other movies like them, but they can both be summed up pretty thoroughly with the synopsis, "a man loses his family to a cruel and oppressive regime, and then fights like hell to overcome his enemies." There's power in that simplicity, not to mention timelessness and mass appeal. But Kingdom of Heaven goes deeper than that. Here, there are no ruthless arch-rivals; instead, there are chivalrous generals on opposite sides of an eternal religious conflict. And there is no grand martyrization of the hero at the end as he overcomes insurmountable odds; instead, the movie ends in a stalemate of sorts, just like the Crusades, and not all that unlike the state of Christian-Muslim relationships in the Middle East today. Still, I can't give Kingdom of Heaven full credit for pushing the genre to new heights, because it was far too entrenched in the genre to avoid using the aforementioned tropes and there were too many other issues - from Edward Norton to Orlando Bloom to the lackluster romance subplot - to ignore. It almost seems like Ridley Scott could have made either a better epic movie had he reigned in his tonal goals a bit or a smarter and more insightful movie had he ignored the confines of the genre and been more courageous in exploring the philosophy and politics of the religious conflict. A solid movie, overall, but one that could have been better in two entirely different ways.

The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle

I've gone Murakami... and my head's still spinning. 

What a weird fucking book. Based on Sweeney's recommendation, I traveled down this rabbit hole completely clueless on what I was going to experience. Beforehand, Sween had sent me this Murakami bingo card as a joke eluding what I was in for:

As you can see, there are tiles pertaining to an unexpected phone call, parallel worlds, weird sex... and cats (Japan loves there cats). That really sums up the tone and feel to this particular Murkami novel. It's out there (at times, really out there) and yet does a great job at pulling on those heart strings and being relatively down to Earth. As I'm thinking back on the book, I suppose this is my first major praise of Murakami's work here. Never have I experienced something so transcendental all the while keeping its feet firmly grounded. But for those completely unaware of this novel, let me give a quick rundown of its story.

We basically have one dude (actually, it would be best if you though of a Japanese version of The Dude from The Big Lebowski) who is living a fairly normal, simple life with his wife in Japan. This guy is unemployed (by choice) and spends most of his time just sort of putzing around. First thing, the couple's pet cat goes missing. Soon after that, the guy's wife goes missing. And not long after that he learns that she has left him explaining that she has cheated on him and has irreversibly changed as a person - never can she return to him. This guy (his name is Toru, by-the-way -  not sure why I didn't explain that beforehand?) will not accept this and is nonchalantly determined to bring her back. Only he has no clue how...

Now, this may seem like a no-brainer on what this whole book is about: a man winning back his girl. Simply, yes... that is what the book is about in someway; however, there's a very long, convoluted road to get there. And along that road the novel drifts in-and-out of being a fantasy/sci-fi story to a historical fiction to a serious drama piece. This is of no fault to the writer or the story. The book isn't struggling to find its voice. It's voice is just really fucking out there. 

So, while Toru is on this journey to bring his love back, he encounters many strange people in many strange venues. All of these people imparting important lessons on him. Toru (and you as the reader) slowly soak up this information that by the end, a lot of things suddenly start to make sense. I found myself getting initially frustrated as I was reading this book. Random weird crap was happening without any explanation, and when things become confusing they can also become unentertaining. Standard fantasy/sci-fi stories typically solve this problem by explaining to their audiences, right from the get-go, the rules in which their characters, society, and environment are grounded in. Then the story can unfold with everyone understanding what the fuck is happening. Murakami doesn't do that here. You read it with this mentality that you'll accept things as they come to you - it's very Zen-like. And seeing how this novel stresses a great deal on the subconscious and the powers that lie within our mind, it's an appropriate route to convey ideas without ever actually explaining them in detail.

Overall, I did like this book. It's not my favorite novel ever, but only because this is just not the type of story I'm naturally attracted to; however, I can completely understand why there are some hardcore Murakami fans out there. He's a great writer and a fantastically imaginative storyteller. If anyone is struggling to find something new to read and are the slightest bit curious about Murakami, go ahead and give it a shot. Just acknowledge the fact that you're going to have to loose yourself in mysticism and side-stories before you reach the last 50 pages where things logically click together leading to a really gripping ending. 

I'll get back to Murakami at some point in the future. For now, I'm delving back into the comic world - getting sleepy with Sandman.  

Boardwalk Empire: Season Two

There were many reasons I decided to get HBO, most of which is the fact that there's a huge backlog of older quality tv available streaming and much cheaper than DVDs. I was however, interested in a few shoes that were currently airing- Game of Thrones, Girls, and Boardwalk Empire. While the first two have delivered (not everyone liked Girls' second season but it certainly kept me interested), I think after two seasons of Boardwalk Empire I might sit the rest of the series out. The draws of a fantastic actor in Steve Buscemi and a big-budget recreation of an exciting time in American history (bootleggers in Atlantic City during Prohibition) were huge, but I just don't feel like the story here is engaging enough for me to want to stick around. Season two focused on the power plays between Nucky and Jimmy, two rivals who seek to control the flow of alcohol in and out of the city, but it was tough for me to really care who came out on top, although credit is due to the show for definitively having one character "on top" by the season's end. I dunno, individual storylines can be interesting enough, but I'm not really sure where this is going and I don't like the characters enough (except for maybe Van Alden) to keep watching. Oh well! I'll leave season three on my backlog page in case I ever get around to it.

A Game of Thrones

Oh nice, I've got a backlog of posts from earlier in July, so hopefully I can get a few of them written up today. First off is A Game of Thrones, the first book in the A Song of Ice and Fire series from George R. R. Martin. I had seen the first three seasons of the show earlier this year, so to make up for the wait until season 4 starts, I'm going to try to read the first three books by then. This will mean that season 4 will likely cover some things I haven't read yet, as well as some that I have, so that feels like a good spot for me to stop by then- able to see the adaptation in action, but still be surprised by the season's ending. Anyway, enough about my watching and reading plans, how was the book? Mostly as I expected- a very fun read that greatly expanded on the background of the series. I felt like I was at an advantage having watched the first season before, because the book drops so many characters on you, and it's good to know who's important and who isn't. It also helps explain some plot points that I missed completely- I don't think I had any idea what was going on in the show when Tyrion was imprisoned on a mountaintop, but the book made perfect sense out of a scene that I just kinda went with the flow with earlier. The book is divided up into several third-person character-specific chapters, and I had forgotten how Stark-centric season one is- only Tyrion, Danyris, and a few Night's Watchmen in the prologue are non-Starks who get their own chapters. This makes it a bit of a slog when you read chapter after chapter of certain characters, knowing that their story will be "cut short" prematurely, but it never got to be boring at least. So, yeah. As was said to me many times, I will say to others: Read the books.

Workaholics: Season 3

Three seasons in, it's safe to say that Workaholics works a lot better on DVD or On Demand than it does in weekly solitary offerings. When I'm watching one Workaholics episode a week, I'm easily underwhelmed and unimpressed by this show when it's delivered to me one bite at a time, but sitting back and ripping off four or five episodes at a time was a pretty enjoyable experience. The episodes varied in quality, with only two or three fantastic episodes, the rest mostly enjoyable, and just a small handful of duds. Of note were a real time episode, an origin story, and the season finale, a futuristic "what if" tale involving cyborgs, anal probes, and Tom Green. It'll never be one of the best shows on television, but I'm glad that Workaholics has been renewed for at least two more seasons.

Arrested Development: Season 4

Ok, so I really didn't catch this series all that much later than anyone else did, and it doesn't actually exist on DVD or anything, but I'll post anyway. It's a slow month, and the precedent has been set. Arrested Development is back with 15 new episodes, and now without the constraints of network television, creator Mitchell Hurwitz was able to experiment and let the show try something new. Given the busy schedules of the cast, most of whom are now working on other shows and projects, the episodes focused specifically on one character each, no longer conforming to 23 minutes of A, B and C-plots. This led to varying results for the different characters- George Sr and Lindsay have a few weak episodes each, while GOB, Maeby, Tobias and George Michael have really strong showings. Those poor episodes occured towards the start, too, while the best episodes rounded out the season. I suppose this was by design as the best episodes tie together a lot of loose threads and plotlines from the earlier ones, so the whole thing does come together nicely. Still though, I have no regrets about the way I watched Arrested Development's fourth season- a few episodes at a time spread out a little over a month. Most of my fellow bloggers got together to power through it on day one, and while a nice get-together with my friends is something I wish I could have been there for, I'm curious how it seemed. I imagine after a slightly dull first 2 hours or so people were checking cell phones and chatting, and I wouldn't blame them- I think I'd get restless. I haven't really read the older posts on Arrested, so I ask. How was the group watching? Worth it?

Dying of the Light

Too many isolated thoughts on this one and no desire to connect them into something coherent. It's bullet time, baby!

• This is the first book I've posted since The Beautiful and Damned in late April. Last year, I went from late April to late July without posting a single video game. This year, I've accomplished the same feat with books. Needless to say, I'm more embarrassed this time around.
• Yeah, that's right. This is a book by George R. R. Martin, author of A Game of Thrones and all of its sequels. But it's a very different book than any of those are, clocking in at just 240 pages and easily and aptly called "science fiction" rather than "high fantasy" or anything like that. The book was Martin's first, published in 1977 when he was just 29 years old. Wow!
• I really liked this story. I didn't love it, and the ending left something to be desired, but I was impressed and awed by the premise, the consistency of tone and mood, the depth of the four or five main characters, and most of all the imaginative and descriptive world-building done by Martin. Solid characters, dark tones, and vastly imagined worlds are all part of what makes Martin's magnum opus series so great, so I really wasn't surprised to find any of these elements all the way back in Martin's earliest work.
• The story takes place on a rogue planet called Warlorn, drifting slowly away from its multiple suns and toward empty blackness and certain impending doom. The planet thus serves as both a last frontier of sorts, at the edge of the inhabitable galaxy, and also a symbol of human decadence, as all the time mankind has put into terraforming and building up the planet is ultimately going to waste. Damn, the guy who would later bring us the concept of years-long winters sure knew how to set a dark tone right away.
• The main race left on the planet, the Kalavar, are an interesting war-oriented race of people with unique marriage concepts (two guys, one girl) and a complicated honor system comprised of duels and slavery. The main character arrives on Warlorn to rescue his former flame from one of these two-dude marriages to semi-abusive husbands, but, of course, our main guy slowly comes to embrace certain aspects of the at-first-backward Kalavar culture. In this regard the story had a bit too much in common with Avatar, and I hated myself for realizing that, even though the book predates that movie by some 32 years.
• Unfortunately, the main plot - our hero rescuing his lady - doesn't really end up going anywhere. That's not to say that he does or doesn't rescue her, nor that there are or aren't complicated twists involved, but mainly just that the girl herself is a total MacGuffin of a character. She's alright, and not just a flimsy damsel in distress, but she's painted in broad strokes, as is the main character's past relationship with her. The central aspect of the story, then, was easily the weakest thread. Having said that, this was well worth the read and it entertained me thoroughly. In my mind, a good science fiction story is one that can drop you into the middle of a theoretically plausible place somewhere in some made up corner of the galaxy and, in doing so, force you to think critically about aspects of your own society. This book accomplishes that and then some.
• I'll consider more non-Game of Thrones George R. R. Martin books in the future, but here's hoping the next one I read - and soon - is The Winds of Winter.

Professor Layton and the Unwound Future

Here's the third game in the Professor Layton puzzle series, a franchise I've now visited in the summers of 2008, 2011, and 2013. It's essentially the same game as its two predecessors, and I have no reason to believe the two most recent games in the series, which I have yet to buy or play, will be much different. All the same, I enjoyed this one a little bit more than the second game, The Diabolical Box. I beat that game only two years ago, and for the life of me I can't remember more than one or two basic plot components. Even reading the Wikipedia article on that game has left me with only the fuzziest of memories. In other words, the game was almost entirely forgettable. That wasn't the case this time around. True, it hasn't been two years since I've beaten The Unwound Future, but the game's story impacted me to a deep enough degree that I doubt I'll have forgotten all about it years from now. There was an emotional resonance to this tale of love and loss, and while the ultimate solution to the vague mystery was once again a bit convoluted and silly, I felt an actual investment in the characters of Layton and Luke for the first time. What makes Layton tick? What's in store for Luke, who won't be a young boy forever? As far as the puzzles themselves - the real meat of these games - were concerned, there was a complete mixed bag. Some were absurdly easy, others were dumb trick questions, a few were mindless but cumbersome mazes, and plenty were clever or thought-provoking in some way. I'll credit the Layton series with this much - there sure is a diversity and variety to its many puzzles. Three games in, I've solved close to 500 of them, and while there have been repetitious elements to a few of them, I'm left impressed overall at the strength and relative consistency after hundreds of riddles, visual curiosities, and math tricks. All in all, I had my share of fun with this thirteen-hour game, but I'm in no rush to obtain or play the two other games in the series. I'm sure someday I'll find one of them listed for a great price online and I'll jump back into the series. That's exactly how I ended up buying and playing this game after a two year hiatus, after all. For now, though, it's time to get back to Kid Icarus, hand cramps and all.

Luigi's Mansion Dark Moon

I'll get it out of the way. This game is incredible. It's just so damn fun. If you have a 3DS, get it. It's head and shoulders above the first entry into the series. It's about 3 times as long and 100 times as varied (not surprising as the first was a Gamecube launch title). It takes the simple concept of Luigi sucking ghosts into a vacuum and makes it anything but. The boss battles (for the most part) are inspired, the settings are amazing and the puzzles are challenging enough to be fun without being so challenging that you want to rip your hair out.  This game took me about 16 hours to beat and I enjoyed every second of it. I made a point to not use a strategy guide on this so some of you might be able to take it out in a few hours less. But for those of you who have to 100% games, you might be looking at twice as long. As every level has a Boo that is hidden and must be captured and every mansion has 16 gemstones to find, there's a lot to go back and do. So don't fear that the game is too short to warrant a purchase.

Anyway, though few, there are some complaints I have. For one, I'm not sure the game needed to be structured with levels. Each of the five mansions has around five levels. But, there doesn't seem to be any reason to separate the mansions into levels other than to give the professor a reason to bring you back to his lab and tell a lame joke. I would have preferred there just being five mansions that you could peruse at your own pace. The content of the mansions would not have to change at all, you just wouldn't have to be pulled out so often. Also, this game is pretty easy other than the second to last level, which is incredibly hard. Still, once I finally beat the last level, it was very satisfying.

Overall, this is easily in my top 3 as far as 3DS games go (which is saying a lot) and I think it's as good of an argument as any for Trevor to get a 3DS.

V/H/S/2

It's back...

Yes, a sequel has been made for V/H/S that's set to hit theaters this weekend. It's also available for digital download right now if your as interested as I am. My reaction the first movie wasn't so great - other than I was excited for another horror movie compilation - however, with the initial reviews on RT ranking this guy at 88% fresh I thought they may have worked some of the kinks out of the story. 

For the most part, they did. 

It's a lot better than the first time around. There's still a similar framing device of the main narrative that introduces each horror vignette, but at least now there's a some semblance of a story that's tying everything together - something the first film completely lacked. 

Anyways, like before, I'll give a quick breakdown on each story and how they ranked for me.

The film opens on a pair of boobies. (So far, so good.) However, instead of a bunch of malevolent hipsters filming their destruction rampage, we're now following a couple that work as private investigators - they're spying on a husband cheating on his wife at a seedy motel. Moving on, these PI's break into the home of a college kid who's apparently gone missing. The kid's mother has hired them to find any information on her child. They break in, no one can be found, then, boom... we have the same set up as the first film - a wall of TV all playing static surrounded by VHS tapes. Trying the figure out what the hell is going on, they being to play the tapes.

Tape 1: Phase I Clinical Trials

I have an issue with my left eye. It sees dead people. 

Here we've got a guy who's just received this top-of-the-line prosthetic eyeball. He's the subject of some sort of clinic experiment so the footage is all being recorded through the eye - kind of a neat, original idea for that whole found-footage filming technique. The only catch to all this? He sees dead people. Yup, apparently the weird electronic eyeball doesn't only allow the guy to see, it's allows him to see the ghosts that regularly exist all around us. Another character who has a ear implant from the same company (and can apparently hear the ghosts) visits this guy halfway through. Her advice to avoid the ghosts is to ignore them... so they, of course, bang (it's also the last time you see boobies in the movie - shocking). But it all ends up being for naught. You can piece together what probably happens to them. Basically, the ghosts turn violent when they know you can see them. What's more exciting is the weighty decision the guy has whether or not to keep his fake eye (what the photo above alludes to). Yesh...

Wasn't a huge fan of this story. It's not the worst in the bunch and it's definitely creepy. My only major complaint is that what little this franchise has of an over-arcing storyline, this vignette does not contribute to it. However, the next two videos do. 

Tape 2: A Ride In The Park

A day in the life... of a zombie.

Ever wonder what the world is like through the eyes of a zombie? Then this is the film for you. A guy out for a morning bike ride before he meets up with his girl for breakfast is suddenly attacked by a couple of zombies. After being bitten, and bleeding badly, and runs to an open field and collapses. Seemingly dead, a few more bikers stumble across his when he awakes as a zombie and attacks them. Now the game is on. With his own little zombie posse forming, the next group they stumble upon is some little girl's birthday party. A big zombie attack ensues, once again, all from the perspective of our biker friend.

This is my favorite film of the bunch. Other than the fact that I think it's a brilliant idea to have a GoPro camera mounted on a zombie, there's actually a really moving love story here. The biker catches his reflections in a car window (after murder a couple of people) and sees the monster he's become. Next he sees a woman on the ground weeping for her fallen husband. With his next prey in sight, he suddenly gets a call from his girlfriend again. In that moment, you can hear faint sounds of crying gurgle out of his throat. To his side he spots a shotgun and well... maybe there's always a little human left in all zombies. 

Tape 3: Safe Haven

Don't drink the kool-aid!

This is the creepiest film of the bunch. A film crew of journalist head to southeast Asia to investigate this controversial cult that preaches finding inner-peace, enlightenment, and all that hippie garbage. Of course when the news crew gets there things go terrible wrong and they all have to scramble for their lives as this is the cult's day of reckoning. 

This story is really wacky and out there, so I'll refrain from divulging some of the bigger shocks and twists. I will say this. In keeping with a similar storyline from tape 2, it does involve zombies again. Plus another surprisingly hilarious guest. In fact, the last shot departs from the creepy, far out horror the entire segment builds on, and is just so stupid it's funny. 

Sorry if that's really vague, but for anyone who watches this I would be ruining the best part of the whole film if I revealed the true ending. Even the Wikipedia summary wouldn't do it justice. You've got to see it for yourself.

Tape 4: Slumber Party Alien Abduction

The truth is out there... in your backyard.

Last at bat is just what the title says. It's an alien abduction that occurs to a bunch fo kids that are having a sleepover with their friends while the parents are out of town for the weekend. I was having fun with this story until the very end. The aliens were freaky. A lot of suspenseful camera angles and aliens chasing the kids. But, in the end, the segment did one thing I can never allow: they killed the dog. If you look closely at the still above you can see hair on the bottom of the image. The camera in this story is another GoPro only mounted on top of the family dog. In the last scene, the one surviving kid still on the run finally gets sucked up into the spaceship's tractor beam while holding the dog. Unfortunately, he loses his grip and drops Rover to his death. The last shot is the camera (after being dislodged from the dog upon impact) angled at the dog's face as you watch him die with a whimper.

Boo... Sad and unnecessary. Needless to say, this was my least favorite segment. I don't have many rules in movies, but unnecessarily killing animals (especially cute, innocent ones) is never allowed. 

So, in between all of these videos we've been following this investigative team searching through the house for this missing college kid. Of course, the kid is in the house with them - seen occasionally lurking in the background. What was brilliant on the film's part was that you're slowly watching this webcam video the kid was taking on his laptop vaguely explaining these videotapes. By the end, you see that he intends to make his own video. Next thing you know, out comes a revolver and he blows off his head. A few seconds go by and the kid regains consciousness, now a zombie. What really blows my mind is that you hear some clamor in the background. The kid runs off. Then the two investigators shuffle into the shot. Ah! Great moment. 

In total, the film is still not exactly where I want it to be, but it's lightyears above its predecesor. In fact, if you were ever considering getting into these movies, I would just skip the first and move right into the second. It's also satisfying that they're starting to allude to some explanation behind the whole V/H/S mythos. I mean, what do these tapes do? How is it that they make people go insane? Where are these tapes even coming from? Seems like the answers to these questions mostly revolve around the idea of the undead. It's still a long way from any concrete answers, but at least it's something to go off of. The best thing this series could do is to have their horror vignettes become an essentially part of the main story, meaning as the main characters (and audience) watch these tapes, they may piece together some current mystery and figure out what's in store for their future. 

I'm sure there will be more sequels to come. And I'm sure that these answers will be fleshed out as time goes on. It's at least promising that the series is taking a step in the right direction.

Chronicle

Was not expecting much from this movie. HBO just updated their catalog for the month, and this film was added. With not much to do last morning I decided, "Why the hell not?" The writer is a guy named Max Landis who's a successful up-and-coming screenwriter from our generation. He's got a few projects in the works, but I think this is the only major feature film  of his produced so far. Anyways, I thought I would give it a go and see what kind of talent this guy has.

...and it's good.

Like, really good.

Like, now one of my favorite superhero films good.

It's a simple story told in an extraordinary way. You have three high school seniors who  decide to go exploring a mysterious cave they find outside Seattle and end up encountering some weird shit - erie glowing crystals that look out of this world - that causes them to all blackout. Next thing you know, they awake to find out they have telekinesis, are super durable, and can fly. (They basically have the quintessential superpowers aside from super strength or heat vision.) Everything is fun and games for them as they begin exploring their powers in different ways until one of the kids (the one who's picked on in school and has a troubled home life) ends up going bat-shit crazy and recking havoc on the city.

There are two things about this movie that I'm really impressed with. First is the technique at how the movie was shot. They did the whole mockumentary-thing where the movie is pieced together using "found footage" - same as Blair Witch Project or Cloverfield - only they flipped it on its head. They did a great job at really making the camera feel like another character. The antagonist, Andrew, opens the film as he's just purchased a camera to secretly film his alcoholic father beat him. Then, out of a sense of curiosity (that later morphs into egotism) Andrew documents everything in his life. Once Andrew gains his powers they have these great shots of him floating the camera around his body as his just stares into it giving the audience a window into his madness. On a side note, this is a clever technique to bring in some captivating tracking shots in shooting style that normally would never allow such thing.

During the climax fight scene, where Andrew doesn't have his camera anymore, the movie switches up the rules basically allowing footage gathered from all authentic, organic sources (i.e. cell phones, news reporters, security cameras... you get the idea). It's brilliant! There's even one moment where Andrew, in all of his deranged, egotistical rage, floats above the Space Needle and pulls a buch of cameras from tourist. He then has them circle his body while a conversation transpires between him and his superpower-endowed cousin. From the audiences viewpoint, we jump around Andrew in a disorienting, maddening way. It's epic and a lot of fun.

I honestly think what impresses me the most about this is that it looks as though all these camera shots had to be intentionally penned out in the script. Props to Landis. 

The second thing I love is the development of the bullied antagonist, Andrew. He goes completely bonkers in the movie, but the conditions he's raised in makes you feel sympathetic. Seeing as how he has the camera, the movie really focuses on him the most. You witness his abusive, alcoholic father beat the shit out of him. You see Andrew weep for his mother slowly dying of cancer. Watch as bullies continuously pick on him at school. Even though he becomes this horrible monster by the end, I can't help but feel as though I wouldn't be any different had I been in his shoes. After watching superhero movie after superhero, it' s rare to find one that makes you feel so strongly for the villain as much as this one does - at a distant second there's young Magneto being tortured as a child at the Jewish concentration camps.

I remember seeing this come to theaters and instantly brushing it aside. There didn't seem to be anything that compelling to make me think it could be worth my time and money. Plus I'm not a huge fan of found footage movies. Well, almost a year and a half later, I've come around. Wikipedia mentions that Landis has signed on to do a sequel with Fox. If that project does make it to the finish line, I'll be sure to check it out in theaters. 

City of God

I learned something interesting on my honeymoon: Netflix Streaming while in a British territory is vastly different (better!) and I was able to stream City of God. I had no idea what to expect when I started this movie with Danielle. She made it about 5 minutes, but I knew, after 5 minutes, that I could not turn away. Everything about this movie is engaging, from the cinematography to the dialogue and everything in between. This movie was close to perfect. It's tough to explain, but everyone should see this movie (and judging by our ranks for nothing votes, almost no one has).

Dexter: Season 7

That's better. In fact, up until about halfway through the season, this may have been my favorite season of Dexter since the first two. There was a renewed sense of direction, it seemed, as well as a charismatic and haunting main antagonist. Eventually though, the season fell into the same old trappings that have doomed so many previous Dexter runs. It felt like the back half of episodes played out like a "greatest hits of Dexter" collection, with Dexter falling in love, being suspected and pursued by a coworker, teaming up with another killer, and so many other things. Season 8 will be the show's last, and I'm interested enough to check it out on DVD eventually, but frankly I'm glad to see the show coming to an end.

So, no, Trev. There really isn't much worth continuing for if you stopped after Season 2.

Micro

I received my Kindle on Christmas 2011 from Danielle (Thanks Danielle!). The first book I purchased on my Kindle was Micro. The story behind this book is that Crichton was in the midst of writing it when he passed away in 2008. As a huge Michael Crichton fan (Jurassic Park!), I knew I needed to read this book. However, you can probably guess that I was not a huge fan seeing as I purchased it in 2011 and was not able to finish it until 2013. I found myself trying to pick out when it was Crichton's writing and when it was Preston's. Being biased, any parts of the book I hated I credited to Preston and anything I liked I credited to Crichton. It breaks down like this: I loved the first 40% of the book, could not stand the middle 30% of the book, tolerated/liked the next 20% and got a huge kick out of the last 10% just because of sheer ridiculousness of the climax and conclusion. Anyway, I read the first 40% of it before putting this book down for over a year. Because of that, I lost some of the details along the way, but I can say that this book makes Jurassic Park seem completely plausible by comparison. The amount of pseudo science spread around in this book boggles my mind. Anyway, a scientist creates a way to shrink humans and rather than just shrinking his kids, he shrinks robots as a way "to cure disease." However, the billionaire backing the project decides to take the technology and try to sell it to the highest bidder for much more sinister applications. Because of that, the billionaire convinces himself that he needs to murder everyone. First, however, he shrinks the people so there is no evidence. Anyway, he fails and a group of scientists are micro-sized for most of the book (the part of the book that I did not enjoy) and then they gain "super powers" because of the change in physics based on their size. It's as stupid as it sounds. Anyway, if you enjoy Crichton, proceed with extreme caution. I am glad I read it, but never again. Never again.

Animal Crossing: New Leaf

In true Keith fashion, he has peer pressured me into posting on one of the (can't say many due to a lack of free time in recent months) books, tv shows, movie and video games that I have not written about.

I am reviewing today, Animal Crossing: New Leaf for the 3ds. Recommended by Webber, I decided to take up this game while in the Turks and Caicos. I am mildly obsessed. I don't play video games often, but this reminds me more of my old computer gaming days where I spent hours playing the Sims, Oregon Trail, etc. Basically, upon arriving in Animal Crossing you become mayor of the town. You must make money by collecting pears, shells, fish and fossils in order to buy a house and expand on that house. In addition, you must be a good politician and talk to your neighbors, get them pears when they ask for them, and help develop the town. I am still in the early stages of the game, but I enjoy it so much that I had to postpone dinner because I had a 6:00 date with one of the animals in town.

I give this game an A for people who like simulated games.